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Being a woman is not easy
4 Tips for Reaching Out to Your
years are some of the most complicated for our children. Bodily
changes, hormonal swings, and new feelings all make it an
important time for your child to have your support. Teens often
either donít know how to talk to you or even may not initially
want to, so most of the responsibility will fall on you as a
parent. Here are a few things to keep in mind when reaching out
to your teen.
1. Keep an
eye on self-esteem
be a particularly tricky issue for teens,
girls. Make sure she always knows youíre proud of her, win or
lose, succeed or fail. Negative self-image can cause depression
and eating disorders, so talk to her about the pressures she
might be feeling to look, eat, or dress a certain way. Pay
attention to how she carries herself ó does she walk tall, or
does she keep her head down most of the time? Give her a sincere
compliment whenever you get the chance, even if itís something
you think she knows. A simple, ďYouíve been doing really
excellent in school this term, way to go!Ē can make all the
difference to a teen who may feel insecure.
2. Donít let
arguments escalate out of control
there are going to be a few
between you and your teen; itís the nature of any important
relationship to have a disagreement now and then. As the parent,
itís crucial that you maintain control of these situations and
donít let them exceed your power. Donít display outwardly
aggressive behavior like invading personal space or staring her
directly in the eye. Be mindful of your body language ó which
can sometimes drown out your words ó as well as the words you
use and your tone. Stay calm. If the argument appears to be
escalating, tell her you should both take some time to step away
and gather yourselves. Once youíve both calmed down the
conversation will usually be a lot more productive. Keep in mind
that sometimes, a teen (or anyone, for that matter) just needs
to vent; it doesnít mean your efforts are wasted or that she
wonít open up to you later.
3. Find fun
ways to connect
relationship with your child should extend past suppertime and
morning car rides to school. Just because youíre the parent
doesnít mean you canít have fun together, so find entertaining
ways to bond. Go to a sports event, see a movie, or have dinner
together. You can even be
partners; take a hike through the woods to get some fresh air or
go for a stress-relieving swim at the local health club. She
needs to know that you donít just check in when things are
obviously wrong, but that youíre always there ó good times and
We all want to
feel like what we do matters and our hard work is noticed, so
donít assume your child knows how proud and grateful you are.
Make it a point to
of her good habits ó like how she always does the dishes without
asking ó and thank her for them. If sheís a star pupil, donít
let her good marks go unnoticed simply because youíre used to
them. Celebrate a high exam score with her favorite meal or a
day trip somewhere special. If you get an attitude when asking
for a favor, sincerely thank her for helping you out and taking
time out of her day. Remember, just because she doesnít have a
job doesnít mean she doesnít have a hectic workload! Recognizing
all that she does can build her self confidence and create a
stronger, happier bond between you.
Donít let the
isolating teenage behavior create a gap between you and your
child. Make the extra effort to reach out to her and be present
in her life, and soon sheíll find the courage to come to you on
The Key To Taking Care Of Yourself As A Single Parent
Photo via Pixabay by
Being a single parent is one of the hardest jobs anyone can
have; by taking on dual roles, you ensure that your child is
well taken care of, but you also ensure that your mind, body,
and emotional well-being take a toll. Itís important to take
care of yourself, too, to keep from getting burnt out;
sometimes, when weíre tired or overwhelmed, itís easy to let our
emotions get out of control. For this reason, itís imperative to
take a break when you feel like youíre having a hard time
managing everything, for the emotional and physical safety of
One of the best ways to make sure you are well taken care of is
to set aside time every day that is just for you. It doesnít
have to be an entire hour, although it could be if you wish.
Finding time in your busy schedule to do something for yourself
is not always easy, but it can be done. Before you go to
bed, look at the upcoming day to see if you can find a few
moments to carve out for you. It could be as simple as setting
your alarm a little earlier than normal so that you can enjoy a
few minutes of peace in the morning before the chaotic routine
begins, or you might decide to get in a walk or some yoga.
Never be afraid to ask for
help. You may be a single parent, but that doesnít mean you have
to go it alone. If your child has grandparents who are willing
to help, work out a schedule in which they look after your child
for a night or even just a couple hours each week. Chances are
that time will be
and enjoyable for the grandparents and
your child, and youíll get some much-needed time alone.
Exercise is definitely important in staying healthy, and not
just physically; getting out in the fresh air, or practicing
something mindful (such as yoga/meditation) is a wonderful
stress-reliever and is recommended for the emotional and mental
well-being in people who are recovering from trauma or a
substance abuse disorder. You might find that you want to make
time for it every day if it makes you feel good.
The stress of being a single parent can sometimes
lead to substance abuse, and while thereís certainly nothing
wrong with an occasional glass of wine or beer, it can become a
problem when you are relying on drugs or alcohol to help you get
through the day, to control your emotions, or to get to sleep.
Itís important to remember that there are healthier ways to do
those things, and that you may be unwittingly putting your child
at risk for future issues. Studies have shown that children who
come from a single-parent home can have
increased risks for many different
problems, including substance abuse, risky behavior, and
Money is always a major factor for single parents,
so give yourself some peace of mind and sit down with an
accountant to get control of your
finances. Donít be afraid to ask questions
about budget planning and saving for retirement (many employers
offer 401K benefits; ask your HR rep about it to get details),
as well as planning for college funds. It can be done, it just
takes some organization. You might be able to boost your earning
power by taking classes or earning a degree, and in some cases
employers might even help you pay for school.
It can be difficult for single parents to see
potential areas of improvement or to congratulate themselves on
a job well done, and because thereís no partner around to give
feedback or support, itís important to seek out friends who have
kids. Having a
not only ensures that you have
someone to talk to who understands what youíre going through,
but youíll also be able to create a buddy system, wherein you
swap kids for play dates and give one another an occasional
Women Need to be Paid Less so
They Can Find Husbands
Sunday, Rep. Marsha Blackburn (R-TN) sought to advance the GOPís
rebranding effort among female voters by suggesting that
Republicans have long ďled the fight for womenís equality.Ē The
statement came just days after Republicans voted down the
Paycheck Fairness Act and sought to downplay the problem of
equal pay for equal work by suggesting that Democrats were using
the issue to distract from Obamacare.
days later, a prominent member of the Republican movement
further undermined the partyís campaign to appeal to women
voters by suggesting that the current pay gap isnít wide enough.
In an op-ed published by the Christian Post, Phyllis Schlafly ó
the founder of the Eagle Forum ó maintained that increasing the
pay gap will help women find suitable husbands:
To Read More, click
penalty: Itís not children that slow mothers down
December 8, 2011 by
Curt Rice http://curt-rice.com/2011/12/08/the-motherhood-penalty-its-not-children-that-slow-mothers-down/
There are fewer women
at the top because they have a different work/life balance than men, it
is claimed. Mothersí careers progress slowly because they are mothers ó
because they have to spend more time on their children.
Thereís some appeal in
this explanation; it seems intuitively correct. Mothers have greater
childcare responsibilities than fathers. And while we may hope for a
different division of labor some day, we speculate that these work/life
realities explain why women who are mothers are on slower career tracks
Itís the realities of
daily life behind the statistics that in fact explain the statistics.
Correlation becomes causation. But thatís a mistake in how we think.
Thereís more to the story.
New evidence on womensí
careers is presented in the White Paper on the Position of Women in
Science in Spain. A man with children, the report concludes, is four
times more likely to become a full professor than is a woman with
children. To read more, click here
will never be equal to men as long as men never have to bear a
child. Until men have children, the same as women,
equality will never happen.
other countries throughout the world recognize this fact and
that these children are the future treasure of the country, they
take steps to insure that children are protected and cherished.
They have a NATIONAL DAYCARE SYSTEM that assists in teaching the
future generation, preparing them for school and expanding their
minds. These professionals are just that, PROFESSIONALS
who have gone to college, have degrees and learn how to
encourage the children in their keeping. This allows the
mother to continue her career or seek a new one. She is
not forced into a loveless marriage, nor considered property by
her partner or state; but rather as an integral part of society.
In the United States, we try
to control, limit the power of being a woman. Treating her
as less than a thinking male. Limiting her ability to
control her own body. In some States, even to the extent
of forcing her to keep the child of her rapist; and raising the
child, allowing the rapist to have visiting rights to child.
In some States, she is considered nothing more than a broodmare.
is a comprehensive list of 40 quotes uttered by Republicans
about rape that women should keep in mind the next time they go
into the voting booth in 2014.
When the next election rolls around, let's not forget these 40
egregious rape quotes from the GOP.
1. "Rape is terrible. Rape is awful. Is it made
any better by killing an innocent child? Does it solve the
problem for the woman that's been raped? We need to protect
innocent life. Period."
-Kansas Governor Sam Brownback, declaring that raped women must
be additionally forced to carry and give birth to their rapist's
baby against their will in front of an all male crowd at the
National Catholic Men's Conference, June 2007.
To read more, click here